Ramadan Iftar in Jisr az-Zarqa, a lesson in friendship and hope
By: Yaara Di Segni
(An article published in the Saloona website>>)
When I was invited to a Ramadan Iftar joined dinner for Jewish and Muslim women in Jisr az-Zarqa, first, I was happy, and only afterwards, I began to ask myself questions. Who will be the women that I will meet? Will we find a common language? How should I conduct myself? And the inevitable question – what should I wear (that will be appropriate to the place and the occasion, and respectful to the hostesses)?
The organizers of the meeting were the members of the Anuar group, which is active in the framework of the SHIN – equal representation of women – movement. The movement was founded by Professor Esther Hertzog as early as 1989, with the goal of achieving social change in the status of women in Israel, by way of promoting women in representative positions and senior roles. The Anuar group is a leadership group of Jewish and Arab women, which has been active since 2002 with the goal of promoting together social and political issues. As a graduate of the Wizo’s Women’s Leadership Program, and as one who has been exposed to the activity of a variety of organizations, such as WEPOWER and WLP, I was happy with the opportunity to be acquainted with a new body acting for the advancement of women and women’s leadership.
I really did not know what to expect from the evening. I knew it would be delicious and diverse, and probably interesting, but that was it. I came with an open mind, and the decision to overcome my shyness, try to get to know the women, and just see how it flows. The welcome was warm, and from then on, the evening just got better and better. At sunset, the voice of the Muezzin was heard, announcing the end of the day’s fast. It was time to eat, and food was plentiful; good and diverse food prepared by the hostesses and the guests, ranging from different salads through Maqluba to vegan sourdough bread, with adequate representation of the different ethnicities and cultures. After the hunger was subdued, the hostesses told us about the essence of Ramadan.
Coffee and dessert (starring Kanafeh and Qatayef; who said heaven did not exist?) were accompanied by conversation and picture taking of everybody by everybody. At this stage, I completely forgot that two hours ago I did not know any of them.
Throughout the evening, one could not miss the profound connection between the women. Those women had been meeting for a long time, and initiating together a joined social action. Inevitably, strong social ties were created, whose importance is no less than that of the action itself.
In Israeli society, there is no lack of conflicts and divisions; religious and secular, right wing and left wing, Jews and Arabs, Israelis and Palestinians… There is no doubt that the tasks of reconciliation are many and not simple, and there is no doubt that if we sit and wait for the government or for others to solve the problems, nothing will change. Much has been said about women being the key to resolving disputes, that through the feminine discourse it was possible to achieve that paradigm shift that was so necessary for breaking vicious cycles of animosity, and bringing about a real change. So it is true that in order to reconcile different groups, to overcome the prejudice, the ideological gaps and the emotional residue, it is not enough to meet for a good meal every now and then, or to initiate social action together. It is true that such meetings and groups are a mere drop in the ocean. However, it is indeed an important and necessary step in the right direction. Without initiatives like that, change will simply not happen, and it is also a circle that needs to be preserved, deepened and expanded.
The evening in the company of the women from the Anuar group offered a small, yet meaningful glimpse into the world of opportunities that such discourse opened up. I left Jisr az-Zarqa with new Facebook friends, a broad smile and a new hope in my heart.
Lastly, 10 facts about Ramadan:
- The month of Ramadan lasts for 29 or 30 days, depending on the sighting of the moon. It can occur in any season of the year.
- During Ramadan, one must refrain from eating and drinking from sunrise to sunset.
- The name, “Ramadan”, is derived from a word meaning “ash” or “cinder”.
- It is customary for some to break the fast with dates that do not burden the stomach, and then go out to pray.
- The essence of Ramadan is not just the fast; this period is characterized by spending time with family and friends, acts of kindness and charity, prayer, introspection and drawing closer to God. Families usually eat together, invite guests or visit others. During this period, one must avoid gossiping and perform good deeds.
- Sick people, pregnant women and menstruating women do not fast. However, on each day that they do not fast, they must give a certain sum of money to charity, or make up each day missed with another day of fasting later.
- Children begin fasting at a very early age, 6-7.
- At the end of Ramadan, Eid al-Fitr is celebrated, which lasts for three days.
- Fasting is considered a healthy process of detoxification, and after a few days, it is not so difficult anymore.
- At three thirty in the morning, people whose job is to wake the people up to have their Suhoor meal walk the streets, a bit like on the Jewish days of Selichot…
- One question that remained unanswered is, when exactly do you sleep during Ramadan? Those who do not work can sleep, perhaps, during the day, but between the Ramadan Iftar dinner and the Suhoor early morning meal there is plenty of activity, and sometimes, there is no time left for sleeping.